Tumbling Through the Years

This month makes the 6 year anniversary of creating this blog. That also makes 9 years of disordered behavior. I've had my eating disorder for half of my life. I'm not sure how that makes me feel but saying it like this is a shocker. It's been my personal drama, my secret, my other half for so long. When something has grown with your personality, been the core of your life, been the only thing that you can hold on to for comfort during the years where you must learn to cope as an adult, how can someone expect me to tear it out of my life? This is why everyone has "given up" at trying to make me eat or recover. I can't separate myself from my so-called illness. It's my life, it always has been.

Summer Madness => Exercise!

This summer, like every summer, I know I'm going to gain weight. We all always do. Being at home with nothing to do, or going on vacations where there's tons of food all around all the time, most people end up adding a few extra pounds before going back to school. We always want to get skinny for summer swimsuits or to show up to the new school year looking better than the last time people saw you, but it's harder to lose weight during the summer than during the school year unless you get the jump on losing weight before vacation even begins.

Knowing that I'm likely to gain weight, I am going to try to make it muscle mass. Summer is the easiest time to exercise, I have no excuse of school work and I'm gonna be sweating regardless so why not make it count.

I am not an active person so I have rather little muscle to start with, so I am breaking it down into three parts. I am currently in the first phase, which is building up the major muscle groups to make more challenging exercises do able when I get there.
Phase One: basics
My current routine is 30 leg lifts (each side), 50 or 100 sit ups, and 15 squats. I plan to do this every day in May though I've already begun. I am going to add in punching the air vigorously for 30 seconds, that's my arms work out, and maybe start doing push ups when I am physically capable.
Phase Two: routines
Starting in June, I will begin doing YouTube videos of various types, probably blogilates and other simple work out videos. I would like to do one every day but I'll start with the minimum of three 15-minute videos every week. I might start sharing the videos I like here in a new post when I get there. They will all be beginner videos so the list I accumulate will likely be helpful to you.
Phase Three: training
For July, I will start running (yes, moving my feet quickly off the ground). I can't run. I just can't. My heart is weak, my lungs whine, I feel like I'm dying after about 15 steps. By July, I would like to have my stamina up that I'll be able to actually run, outside, and not feel like an idiot. I live on a hill, four times around the block I live on is one mile. My plan is to be able to begin running one mile without stopping in the first week of July, and build up from there.

I hope you'd like to gain some fitness over the summer also. Even if you still end up eating too much or gaining weight, you can always exercise. I know we all feel discouraged when we 'mess up' our eating for the day, but you can never mess up exercise, you just have to do it!